Dog Days begin July 3rd, but only in the Northern Hemisphere. In the Southern Hemisphere, it's the beginning of Penguin Days.
Today's exciting Dog Days trivia question: - What are Dog Days anyway? - Dog Days are the 40 hottest days of summer, an evil time when the sea boils, wine turns sour, dogs grow mad, and man suffers fevers, hysterics, frenzies, and electric bills.
My dog hates Dog Days. His tongue hangs out so far, the cat tries to play with it.
Dog Days begin July 3rd. Dog Days are the hottest 40 days of summer when all creatures become languid. So have a nice day.
Both Dog Days and Air Conditioning Appreciation Days begin the same day. During the hottest 40 days and nights of the year, Northern Hemispherians sacrifice to the god Freon -- and send their tithes and offerings to the electric company.
You know you've become languid when: * You doze off while riding the Shock Wave! * Seeing Britney Spears on TV makes you hungry for cantaloupes. * While driving to work in the morning you suddenly realize you've already perspired through your pajama top. * The only thing you can do fast is get tired.
To survive Dogs Days you have appease Sirius, the dog star, by sacrificing a brown dog. To appease the SPCA, it's best to use your barbecue grill and sacrifice a brown hot dog.
Dog Days are the 40 hottest days of summer when everybody feels hot and sticky and terrible and grumpy. Except air conditioning repairmen -- who can't get there until Friday because they're too busy getting rich.
Dog Days begin July 3rd, except in Quebec -- where they're called Les Jours du Bow Wow.
About the Author
Veteran humorist Joe Hickman is editor at http://halife.com
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